In Search of Hope
A number of months ago, a few brief moments of joy in my life ended in a whole lot of sadness. Shortly after I discovered that was pregnant, I had a miscarriage. So in recent months, I’ve been on a journey in pursuit of hope and healing. Making the choice to seek out beauty, remain optimistic and to be at peace with reality isn’t the easiest task. We all know how tempting it is to want to hold on to the toxicity of anger or pain. It’s tempting to want to view the world as an unkind and unjust place. Nevertheless, I’ve tried to put my best foot forward and although my experiences have not been without difficulty, I’ve been humbled by the healing that has unfolded through the process.
I’ve been reminded that as Gabrielle Bernstein says – the Universe has my back – whether I care to acknowledge it or not. I’ve also been reminded that when you set the intention to find something that something is searching for you too. Hope has found me in various ways – in the love of my supportive husband, in the beauty of simplicity and most frequently in the wild whispers of the Earth. Each day, Nature reminds me of what hope is, giving me precious gifts like feathers, the magic of my daffodils and strawberries blooming in the middle of winter and the feel of the warm winter sun against my skin.
In an article that I wrote about my miscarriage for wildwoman.com, I said that:
“Wild Earth is a story of hope. She turns endings into new beginnings. New life always returns to places that have been ravaged by violent fires. At winter’s end the Crocus and Lily of the valley push their pretty little heads through the snow. Seeds that have rested in permafrost for 3,000 years can be brought back to life and germinated. Even arid deserts hold wild stories of hope and promise. The Earth shows us how to start over.” (You can read the full article here – The Secret Life of Surrender)
Even though I’ve experienced a loss, my heart is softened by the nuggets of loveliness and hopefulness of life that seems to keep showing up. Every day, the Universe, Goddess and the Earth show me that live goes on and that what is lost is replaced with new life. And so I remain hopeful, blessed and continuing my journey in search of ever greater hope.