Devise Your TTC Soul-Care Plan

Taking care of your Self – mind, body and soul – is vital to your overall wellbeing and fertility, especially on those rough days when you’re plagued by feelings overwhelming sadness, frustration, inadequacy and tend to be hard on yourself. I keep learning that those are the days when you need self-compassion, kindness and to be gentle with yourself more than anything.  In anticipation of those challenging days where you may feel stressed out, anxious or out of sorts for one reason or another, having a plan to guide you back to a place of calm could be a worthwhile effort that helps you rescue yourself.

In devising your soul-care plan to support you through the difficult moments of your TTC journey, it is worth asking yourself questions such as – What anchors me when my soul craves restoration or inner harmony? What calms my mind and helps you to release your stress and anxiety?  

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Worksheet from the Soulful Fertility Creative Journaling Bundle

The idea is to assess the things and experiences that offer you grounding, stillness, peace and inner healing, then investigate how you can integrate them into your daily experience as often as possible as you go about creating a soul-care plan for yourself.

The following are few ideas that you can draw from if you need a little guidance or inspiration:  

 The Calming Power of Breath Work: The quickest way back to presence is to focus on your breath. The rhythm of your breath is calming. It draws your attention away from distractions and back into the moment. At any moment when you become self-aware during an overwhelming moment, breathe deeply and allow yourself to be.

Meditation for Inner Calm: Like breath work, meditation is another gateway out of a cluttered mind and into a state of peace and serenity. The more you create space between your thoughts, the more you connect with your intuition and find comfort in the present moment.

Setting aside some quiet time to meditate for between 10 to 30 minutes a day can have a significantly calming and healing effect on you. There are various different types of meditations you can use – ones to de-stress and relax, to aid better sleep, to balance your chakras or to let go of worry or negativity.

If you are not experienced with meditation, then start by listening to guided audio ones. There are loads of free meditations available on YouTube and the ‘Calm’ app is also a fantastic stress release and meditation tool.

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What Are Your Restorers?

What restores you? What brings you back to wholeness when you are utterly depleted?

A warm bath with rose petals
A steaming cup of chai tea
The therapy of watching the rain from your window
Reading beautiful poetry
Dappled light dancing on your face
The romance of stargazing from the porch on balmy evening

Your restorers are simple things, soothing things. They are things that rebuild your tired body and mend your soul. They are gentle healing touchstones that resuscitate your inner life. They say that ‘desperate times call for desperate measures’, which makes it easy to reach for the destructive things that could send you further down a spiral of negativity. But, do you know how to reach out for the things that restore your balance or refuel your inner juices instead?

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What do you turn to at the end of a long day?

A hug

A heartfelt conversation with a friend
A healing crystal

Dancing to your favourite song

A vase of flowers on your night stand
Beautiful soft cotton linen
Lavender under your pillow

The more I explore conversations with women around self-love, self-care and depletion (especially during times of extreme emotional turmoil), the more I see how we don’t create space for the sacred ceremony of restoration. Instead, we wait until we reach the messy edge of quiet desperation, a place that all too familiar. A sentiment constantly reinforced is that there are so many things that demand our energy. We are the givers, lending our hands and hearts to those who need us. We are the hard workers, pouring everything we have into the beauty we wish to create. We lose ourselves in the process. We forget to nurture ourselves back to fullness and so we run dry. But why should it take takes reaching breaking point to heed your soul’s call or for you to remember to breathe easy, be gentle, nurture and restore so that the chambers of your heart fill up with the energy, light and inspiration your need to keep going?

If there is one profound lesson that reaching back to life from the edge of burnout, of dealing with lost pregnancies and those taxing moments midst of my fertility journey has taught me, it’s that  – I need to be my own nurturer. Sometimes, it’s harder to choose what serves my well-being over what will cause more harm, because those bumps in the road can become excuses for all the wrong things (overindulging in sugar, not exercising, not meditating, relinquishing important commitments, etc). This understanding inspires me keep asking questions about how I allow moments for restoration daily in order to nurture my well-being and where I can integrate self-care rituals so that they become a natural part of my life that continues to raise my vibration or keep me both spiritually and emotionally grounded.

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I’ve found these two questions are powerful anchors that guide me back to myself and I encourage you to explore them for yourself too:

What is the most healing or nurturing thing I can do for myself right now? and What restores me?

Take stock of whatever your restorers are. Remember them, write them down and keep them close to your heart. Make room for them at the end of each day. They will serve you. They will heal you. They bring you back to life when you are on the brink of falling apart. And if you do fall apart, because sometimes you need to, they are the balm that will piece your fragmented soul back together.

 

Lavender Flower Chai Tea

Full Moon.  

A gentle spiced tea recipe to soothe your soul and bring you home to yourself at the end of a long day.

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To make one pot of lavender chai tea you’ll need (Recipe from Flowering Within book):

2 to 3 tablespoons of black loose leaf tea
1 teaspoon of dried lavender or 2 to 3 fresh sprigs
6 cardamom pods
4 star anise
1 teaspoon of fresh ginger
1 or 2 cinnamon sticks
10 peppercorns
6 whole cloves
A pinch of nutmeg
1 teaspoon of vanilla extract
Raw Honey or condensed milk to sweeten

Directions: Add three or 4 cups of water to a pot and bring to a boil. Then add all the chai spices and lavender to the pot. Lower the heat and let it simmer for 10 to 15 minutes. Turn the heat off and let it cool for a few minutes before straining it into a teapot or heat-safe container.

Sweeten to your taste, add milk if you’d like and then enjoy a nice cup of lavender chai tea to soothe your soul. This recipe should make enough for about 3 servings.

To make a single cup, mix enough ingredients to fill a tea strainer. Place the tea strainer in your cup and top with hot boiled water. Let the tea steep for 3 minutes.

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“We make tea in an empty vessel and then we become a vessel to receive it. The practice of maintaining this emptiness runs through all the world’s mystical traditions.”
~ Frank Hadley Murphy