When the Rain Came

The air smelled of clouds and dust. Then the rain came. First, in spurts of light afternoon showers and then thunder showers are night.

I did what I love to do most. I sat by the window and watched it fall, and my writing flowed better than it has in a while. For the first time in weeks, the breeze was a cool cloak of comfort and rain drops fell through the open window and splattered on my back. The parts of me that had been parched and bare from the desert wave began to drink in the rain’s medicine. It’s as if I’ve had a pen full of dry powder and sand, unable to turn words out onto paper. Now, rain has fallen and turned the sand into ink, so that finally my hand can flow. It’s somewhat of an alchemical phenomenon, because it seems to turn the lead of my creative soul into inspired fluid gold.

I’ve never imagined myself as a river, but perhaps in some way, that is what I am, because these showers have made me feel like a river that is flowing again. I can see more clearly now why some women have written of finding the river within. Clarissa Pinkola Estes speaks of the Rio Abajo Rio, the river beneath the river, when she described the wild soul or creative instinctual life force carried with the feminine psyche. Abby Seixas spoke of it in Finding the Deep River Within too, where she wrote: “When I drop down or go inside, I often have the image of an underground river that is always there, always flowing through me, from a source beyond me, carrying deeply nourishing, life-giving qualities.”

This must be what the watery magic imbued rain awakens within me, drawing fragments of my feminine psyche to the surface so that I become aware of my underground river filling, my creative resources flowing and my wild essence unfurling.

How do you connect with your rio abajo rio? Do the elements and whispers of the Earth ever stir something in this deep and mysterious place?

wild rain

Riding the Desert Wave

It feels like I’m living in a desert space lately. Hot. Dry. Dusty wind. A lot like the semi-desert parts of the Western Cape that I visited last December.

Week of a lingering heat wave…the rains should have come by now. Alas, still none in sight so I’ve had to find other ways hydrate my inner essence its soul soothing absence – swimming, jars of cold water with bits of lemon and strawberries and walks down to the river.

I can’t concentrate. This unrelenting heat has lulled me into a state of estivation. I’ve been hiding out indoors, where it is cool and the white sheer curtains dance in airy rhythms when the breeze flows in. Writing is slow, and I’ve shifted my attention to reading, researching and planning instead, so that I’m not completely idle. I keep wondering – if it’s this hot and dry in spring, then what does summer hold?

Mary Reynolds Thompson says that desert landscapes teach us about simplicity, clarity and emptiness. I can see how, because while I’m not in an actual desert, this extreme heat has got me shedding so many unnecessary layers. Layers of blankets and clothes, clutter in my home and all the unnecessary things and draining activities that zap my energy. I’m getting clear on what truly matters and right now what I need is cool uncluttered airy spaciousness to soothe my soul and fuel my work and creativity.

One thing I have been grateful for is that the heat has made it easier for me to serve my body  and work toward my goal of vibrant health. Simple healthful meals, smoothies, fruit, salads, lots of water…I’m feeling lighter and happy that I’m honouring my commitment to my body.

wedding pic on window sill

What’s happening in your corner of the Earth? How are the cycles of Nature shifting things in your life?

Two desert vibe inspired finds:

I discovered an awesome online archive of these fascinating Desert Magazines.

Edveeje shares the story, A Woman of the Desert, on treesisters.org.

A Reason to Love Yourself

I sat soaking in the whispers of the warm spring breeze. I ask Goddess for some guidance. Then I listened, open to receiving and waited while the dappled morning sun rays danced between the lightly swaying leaves that cast splays of shadows and light onto me. And when I’d sunk deep into that wild and peaceful space, I felt her, a wave of warm love flowing through me.

Answers came from somewhere in that subtle place of overwhelming peace.

Love yourself. You carry a piece of me in you.

If you reject yourself, you are rejecting me. If you want to embrace my presence fully, then you have to embrace, love and accept yourself whole-heartedly.

Remember…you are a precious vessel thoughtfully crafted to house a piece of Divine within. So stop asking what is wrong with you and focus instead on what is right with you. Focus on each detail of your being that was created from a place of loving consciousness.

I let these words sink in and allowed their wisdom to unfold. Simple and familiar words that seemed to hit home in a deeper way today, giving me a reason to love myself.

How to you love yourself? What brings your attention back to the details of your being that were created from a place of Divine loving consciousness?

Love yourself