My Year of Answered Prayers

New Moon greetings!

The world was magic this morning. Although the sky was clear and blue when I woke up, the trees still glistened with diamonds, residue from yesterday’s rain. I lay in my bed for a while, just watching the quiet garden through the window. A cool breeze flowed in, making the sheer curtains dance to its slow soothing rhythm. In a time of drought and El Nino, I had to take some long deep moments to just savour this scene. I don’t know when it will come again.

I’ve been in a space of reflection, allowing and dreaming for the last couple of weeks. A bout of illness that kept in bed during the days building up to the New Year made sure that I stuck to my intention of a slow and centred start to 2016. The dormant phase was necessary because in it’s wake I’ve felt myself rising hopeful, focused and ready to move forward, and especially now with the new lunar cycle.

I searched long and hard for the words that will guide me through 2016 and the energy I want to draw to myself. In the end, it was “Answered Prayers” that settled into my chest and tugged at my heart strings. Last year, my words were “Wild Mother”, words that stimulated a profound shift in my life and that drew me out of my comfort zone in so many ways. I’ve been in awe at how some of the desires I’ve held for so long have manifested in the last year (I’ll explore this more in another post). I feel I owe these blessings to the powerful creative feminine force of the Wild Mother energy. But it also brought with it an emptiness and an acute awareness of the one missing thing in my life – the child I wish to carry, birth and mother.   

So, a few weeks back I found myself at risk of falling into the trap of counting the unfulfilled dreams and desires in my life. Infertility has a way of taking you to those places. I know it all too well. It’s a road that only leads to depression and feelings of being forsaken. It’s a path I’m not willing to walk because it will only advance a swift descend down an already sinking spiral.

That said, as I evaluated the space I was in and contemplated what I want to feel this year, I knew I needed something that would steer me away from the potential danger of being stuck in a place of lack. When I stumbled upon the words “Answered Prayers” they seemed to fit snugly into my emptiness. I saw the words in three different places in a space of a few hours – a sign speaking directly to my heart.

There are three things that made them feel right for me. In order for prayers to be answered, I need to pray. I need to be in communion with Spirit, with Goddess. I like that these words keep me centred in relationship with sacredness and remind me to make space for divine intervention to work magic in my life too. Secondly, I have to ask myself: What am I’m praying for? This question calls me to be intentional, specific and to offer prayers from an authentic place. It requires me to focus on what I want to manifest, feel and experience, not what I don’t want. Meditating on answered prayers also draws my attention to my blessings and what I am grateful for. Gratitude is a deeply healing tool as I’m sure you already know. It’s a touchstone I really need at the centre of my life right now. Starting January off working through Rhonda Byrnes, The Magic, is helping me do precisely that, to be immersed in the vibration of gratitude.

So this is my Year of Answered Prayers.

Do you choose words of focus or mantras for the year? What are your words?  

answered prayers.jpg

Advertisements

What is your heart calling you towards?

Hello dear wild and gentle heart,

I hope that my words find you in a space of peace. I’d like to invite you into a moment of stillness and deep breathing.

Look at the ocean picture below and breathe in its wild healing.

Relax and be open to following the ocean’s wisdom. Does it have anything to teach you? Let your breath and heart synchronise to the rhythm of the waves…deep, slow and steady.

Listen to what it is telling you.

Which part of yourself to do see a reflection of when you watch the waves? What place inside of you does the immense ocean mirror?

What does that part of you need right now? And how can you draw the medicine of the sea into your body and soul?

ocean1.jpg

Spending the last few weeks of the year (2015) at the coast made me feel that I want to be like to ocean, because no matter how far it stretches out venturing over the shores, it always washes back and returns home to itself in the next breath.

Do you know what it feels like to come home to your own full heart over and over again? To be held in its grace?

I think we all do in some way. I want to feel the thrill of that reunion in a much bigger way, though. I want to rush back into my own arms and be fully immersed in my centre, my essence, in a more complete and accepting way than I’ve always struggled to. Don’t you?

Right now, the old tides of time have washed out to sea and are long gone. New waves are slowly washing in like soft laps upon a calm shore, a New Year full of hope and beauty. And of course this newness is stirring wild dreams within, awakening visions of what I hope the year ahead will bring. These dreams are still seeds, settling into the soil of my heart and slowly taking root. I’m allowing these stirrings to unfold at the pace that they need to, trying not to rush into giving voice to them. Slow beginnings are good. They make for authentic and solid foundations on which to build.

So tell me dear friend, what is your heart calling you to this year? May these wild dreams of yours be washed in love and light.

beachmandala1.jpg

A Lavender Kissed Sky

Are you still basking in the afterglow of the Blood Moon’s magic?

The full moon was a quiet and peaceful one for me. I spent time under the stars, journaling by candle light as the moon rose across the sky. I said prayers to release the things that keep me stuck in situations that I’m ready to move on from. Mostly, I just enjoyed being bathed in the moonlight with my heart in conversation with Goddess.

So I didn’t expect to wake up to a morning where I felt stuck, frustrated and where things were just not flowing as I’d hoped. When I couldn’t get passed the invisible brick wall in my path, I took time out to get some sun, swim and read Mary Oliver at the poolside.

There was a strangely mysterious moment when I breathed, released my mucky thoughts and surrendered my body to float freely in the water. I looked up to see that the sky was an unusual shade of lavender, something I’ve never seen before. To be sure that I wasn’t imagining, I pointed it out to my husband. He too was amazed to see a lavender kissed sky. It was a rear treat, and to me, it was a moment of unexpected magic. I wish I’d taken a picture, but by the time I’d finished swimming the sky had returned to its normal bright spring blue. I wondered if it was a sign from the Universe, a signal to look at things from a different perspective, to look at things through the eyes of wonder and awe? Given what I’d been feeling, that would be an apt message.

After the swim and some breathing space, I felt my heart resting in inner peace. It was clear that the fluid vibration of water and a little time to play were just what I needed to shift things back to a space of inspired grace and clarity. I was reminded of the power of play and how making space for it during stressful moments can take you out of stuckness and reinvigorate your wild creative juices.

I returned to my writing desk with a lightness and the magic of the lavender sky stirring wild stories within. The second half of my day has flowed with greater ease, focus and productivity. There are a number of things I am working on behind the scenes – a guest blogging series, new meditations to offer you, an e-course and a short e-book series. I’m slowly getting started on book number 2 as well. All are quite exciting, but of course require a lot of work and a very balanced schedule. Some days I feel pulled in so many different directions. Today’s lesson reminded me that those overwhelming or frustratingly stagnant moments are the best time to disconnect, have a change of scene and shift into a more light-hearted space so that I renew my energy, tap into the flow and am able to return to my tasks with a fresh mind.

What are you learning right now? What soul lesson is the Universe teaching you?

image